Her name is Confidence
I have a green box that I fill with things very special to me. Things that I will never forget in my lifetime. The box was normal coloured box until I decided to paint it green. Perhaps it was so to remind me that better days are yet to come. That a rainbow always comes after the storm. As grIeen is the colour of hope, it helps me to not forget that at times I might not understand the reasons why things are happening the way they are but it could be because God is taking me to another level. God takes away things that no longer belongs to me to give me better things even things that I wasn’t expecting. Or maybe if too many things are happening all at once it’s happening to prepare me for what is coming my way. In my green box that I have named Confidence, I have pictures of amazing scenery with unforgettable moments. Images that I have taken with friends, family, alone or with my better half. All those moments are documented in my soul. It is there that I find true spiritual peace.
When I feel like throwing down the towel, I grab Confidence, open her and in mere seconds can restore my faith and find strength to keep going as if I was re-born. All the movie ticket stubs of movies that I have seen alone or with company I keep in Confidence. They are kept to remind me of all the happy moments spent and moments of which I was afraid with a scene or two of a horror film. I also have the moments that I cried in a cinema as when I watched Titanic or the Passion of Christ.
In my box you can find all the people that I met in my life. Some that have already left my life. Others that will be leaving me life. While others who will remain with me in my journey. Those that have left me I am grateful for their leaving even those that have hurt me. Without the hurt they instilled in me I couldn’t have learned to LOVE completely and deeply. I also learned of what I want and what I don’t want for me. With eyes wide open I learned not to repeat the same mistakes again.
I also have memories of those people that didn’t believe in me and tried to take me off course from my goals. They taught me how to get strength from all avenues and keep on trying to reach my full potential.
In my box I have memories of everything. Even memories of people I believed were really my friends only to find out they never were to begin with. Even wearing masks I am forever grateful, without their mask I couldn’t see the real person behind that mask and only when it fell off did I learn the true value of friendship. That betrayal comes from where you least expect it and not everyone will be happy with your successes. Now I know that I cannot make everyone happy except for myself.
I also have memories of those people that made me fall which just made
me get up as fast as I fell. Only then did I realize that I was on the right path and kept on going except now I was accompanied with determination!